The most inspiring act that Swami performed in my life is the process of understanding Swami from being a part-time “Photo God” to all-time “Personal God”. Since my parents were Sai devotees even before my birth, Sai Organization culture was not new for me but Swami always remained a puzzle. I felt a deep desire to join Swami’s college every time Swami came to Sundaram, where I was in the Bhajan Group. I applied for MSc Maths, and became the only outsider to get selected for the program. Then began my “education for life”. 

It happened in phases. 

Swami is enjoying: In the year 1984, possibly during Janmashtami, I had learnt a seemingly easy Bhajan “Kalyana Krishna” from a senior brother, Sunam Gyamtso,  and sang it for the first time in Poornachandra Auditorium. Swami arrived at Poornachandra and sat down right next to me, a couple of steps above the ground that leads to the stage while his big throne was awaiting on the stage.  He was enjoying the Bhajan. When done, He said, “Chala Bavundhi”. This was truly one of the most memorable moments of divine beauty and recognition.

Swami is teaching: Next year, for Ugadi 1985, Swami taught me His own composition, a song in Tamil titled “Indre Suba Diname” (Today is a Sacred day). While teaching the song, Swami gave a message to treat every day as precious, new and divine. I realised, this is the way to keep our energy level high. Swami gives darshan/interview every day. No weekend. No holidays. For 85 years. Swami treated every day as new. 

Swami is watching: Days passed by and I had completed 4 months of stay in Bhagawan’s present. I had to go home for vacation. Swami gave ne vibhuthi, cash for some white dresses, and asked me when I was leaving and by which bus. I was joyful. I went home, came back to Parthi, and Swami asked me what I did during vacation. Even as I was answering, He cut me off and called the warden and gave a message. Swami told him, “Don’t allow S.Kumar to sing”. He did not want to see me anywhere in the Bhajan Hall. The silent treatment went on for 15 days. A brother, Neil Bordolai, told me, “Kumar, Just approach Swami and ask for forgiveness”. 

But, Swami would not come where I sat. Finally, one day I jumped 4 lines and caught hold of Swami’s feet asked for pardon. That was when Swami said, “Indisciplined Boy!  You were talking too much during Chennai vacation, going from one friend’s place to another showing off about singing in the Mandir etc. Bad lead. Bad lead.” I would not leave Swami’s feet. I was crying profusely. Swami finally said “Hmmm..Chesko”. I took Padanamaskar and received permission to resume my singing. 

This phase made me realize that each Bhajan at His lotus feet was a great opportunity.  Swami taught me many songs that He had composed, gave me the role of a Radha in his own play titled “Radha Krishna” and later in “Cheppinatlu Chesthara” both written and directed by Bhagwan himself.

Swami is listening to my mind: The next phase was the most interesting wherein Swami used to answer even the smallest desires that ran my mind. Swami left for Kodai every summer and would come back and tell me – “Ayyo Papam, did you not come last trip?” 

Mentally, I was praying, “Swami I am about to finish my PhD. When are you going to bless me with this opportunity?” One day, on his way to Brindavan in March 1991, Swami stopped His car on the road, past Gokulam (no hospital those days) and asked me  ‘When are you completing your PhD?” 

I said “Swami, this May”. 

“Oh OK in that case, come to Kodai with Swami.” 

I was on the duty of serving food during the Kodai trip.  Once I felt, “this one day Swami, can I have food along with you, Swami?” Soon, Swami called, “Hey Kumar – go sit on the dining table”. This is just one of the many instances that showed me He operated at my mind level.

Swami communicates in my heart: Swami taught the truth of His existence. He would just reflect my mind in many small activities that happened in his presence. Slowly I learnt to internalize this exercise. Over my 10 years of stay, I realized whatever Swami says is true. Yad Bhavam Tad Bhavati. “If you think I do not know, then I would not want to show that I know. If you think I know, I will show signs that I know.” 

From Swami, I have learnt that LIFE is nothing but SAI – Skill (whatever may be the skill)  + Attitude to handle the skill + Implicit faith that my “Personal God” Swami, travels with me every moment, wherever I go and whatever I do I do it to keep Swami in me happy.

Sundaram Kumar joined Swami’s college for Masters in 1984, went on to complete his PhD and was a faculty member in the Department of Math & Computer Science. He received the divine opportunity to compose the Telugu portion of the famous students’ song – ‘Humko Tumse Pyar Kithna’. He currently works as a Principal IT Specialist for Parsons Corporation on an IT contract with Federal Government at Washington, DC. He has been actively involved in many SAI retreats across the USA, Canada and Carribean Islands, giving talks, Bhajan workshops and music programs.